What do you do when it all falls apart?

I feel like my entire life is falling apart.
Depressing, I know. But it's the truth.

I can't even look at certain pictures anymore without wanting to cry.

I feel like there are only about five people I can ALWAYS count on. Don't get me wrong, I love having those people that I know will always be there for me. Those people know who they are...at least, I hope they do.
But then there are the people who SAY they'll always be here for me...but I just don't believe them anymore. And THAT is a crappy feeling.

Everything in my life has changed. I know change is bound to happen sooner or later, but when everything changes at once, it's kind of hard to deal with.

Lately, I've been feeling like I've completely lost my way; like I'm starting to not know who I am anymore.

It's like I'm just sitting around, watching the world go by and watching good things happen to other people.

While this may seem like a depressing blog (which I guess it is so far), I can tell you one thing:
It isn't.

Because I'm done sitting around. It's time I started living my life the way I want to live it.
I'm done letting other people tell me how to live my life.
I'm done trying to satisfy other people.
I'm done trying to keep my feelings to myself.

So to all the people who have ever made me feel almost heartbroken...
To all the people who have ever made me feel like falling apart and giving up...
To all the people who simply don't give me enough credit...
To all the people who have ever had even one negative thought or thing to say about me...

I'm going to prove you wrong.
And I'm going to show you just how smart I am.
I'm going to show you that karma, no matter how long it takes, really is a you know what.

And to all the people who haven't given up on me...
To all the people who have believed that I can do great things...
To all the people who haven't hated me for things that are beyond my control...
To all the people who care enough to break down the walls I build...
To all the people who love me for who I am, mistakes and all...

Thank you.
You are the ones who keep me going every day.

I've gotta pick myself up, where do I start? 'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart.
I know who I can turn to. I know who is always there for me.
Don't think I don't know when people talk crap about me behind my back.
I'm a heck of a lot smarter than you all think I am.
Street smarts go a long way these days.
I'll prove that in time ;]
And you know what the funniest part of it all is?
It's those people who treat me like crap who make me want to work that much harder.

So, I've decided not to give up on myself just yet.
If you care for me at all, you'll do the same.

PEACE, LOVE, AND COCOAPUFFS
<3
mm